What the blogosphere’s saying about bosses this week…

• The worst bosses of 2011? Our friends at eBosswatch list 100 of the worst bosses of 2011 and include the sexual harassment hijinks of Mike Cordova of Applebees, Mr. 999 himself, Herman Cain, and former Penn State Assistant Coach and man-who-thinks-it’s-ok-to-shower-with-young-boys, Jerry Sandusky. I’m going to have so much fun going through this list and sharing all of the really bad boss dirt with you.

• Over on Forbes.com, Stephanie Taylor Christensen shares five ways to spot a bad boss in an interview.

• Who Moved  My Cheese, Good to Great, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, The Little Engine That Could. The Little Engine That Could? Yes, a retail company vice president gave the employees in his department a copy of The Little Engine That Could as a holiday gift. Meredith Levinson explains why that might not have been such a good idea.

• Unfortunately, you already know this – a bad boss can follow you home. Not literally, although I’m sure that’s actually happened to someone. No, the stress and anxiety caused by a really bad boss filters into your home life. Neil Wagner explains in the Atlantic.

Have a story, news idea or blog you’d like featured in The Really Bad Boss Blog Roundup? Email it to denised (@) reallybadboss (dot) com.

First of all, Beth requires the woman to share a hotel room with her.

In hotel rooms, the employee writes, Beth “will leave the bathroom door open while using the toilet and yelling comments to me (not even my husband does this).”

Beth also walks around the room in her thong and tries to discuss her dating and sex life with the woman while the woman attempts to hide under her covers and fall asleep.

Beth is such a control freak over travel expenses that when she orders room service breakfast, she orders a single entree and pot of coffee and expects the employee to share the food.

The advice columnist who received this letter about Beth suggests that the employee find another job. Ya think? Would you ever share a hotel room with your boss?

Despite dire news warnings about hazardous driving conditions, I wonder how many non-essential (anyone who isn’t a doctor, nurse, cop, fire etc.) employees felt obligated to get to work today, not because the world would end if they didn’t show up, but because of an overly demanding boss or the fear of job loss.

I’ve been there more times than I’d like to count. One particularly challenging winter in the northeast with a blizzard threatening, employees congregated around water coolers wondering who would be bold enough to make the first move. Driving home in blizzard conditions is frightening and all of us wanted to beat the storm home. The bosses, who presumably would have to drive home in the same conditions, never budged, and at 5:00pm we ventured out into madness. Thank God all of us made it home alive but not everyone is always that fortunate.

A friend shared a story of a colleague who, fearful of driving to work in hazardous conditions, called her boss to tell her she wouldn’t be able to make it in.  Her boss gave her an ultimatum – report to work or you’re fired. My friends colleague took the warning seriously and unfortunately lost her life driving to work that morning.Another friend shared a story about a woman who had been ill for some time and had requested extended leave. When it was time for her to return to work she still was not well and requested an extension. Her boss claimed not to have received the approval from HR and insisted the employee report to work. The employee died in the office that day.

I’m not a litigious person, but if there was ever a case for legal action, I think the stories above make that case. In neither story was the employee a medical professional or someone on whose life others depended. They were “forced” to report to work because of policy and because their bosses knew they had the power to make them come in. Let’s hope that stories like this are few and far between and that no employee ever feels obligated to put he life at risk to punch the clock.

Do you have a similar story of reporting to work despite illness or hazardous weather for fear of losing your job? Share your story in the comment section or email it to denised(@ ) reallybadboss.com (remove parenthesis.)

The Casting Firm is asking the question, “Would your real life office antics be entertaining to watch?”

CASTING FOR A NEW DOCU-SERIES: A Major Cable Network is seeking midsize offices full of big personalities that can carry a show. Would your office antics be entertaining to watch?

Is there anything coming up in your workplace that would be exciting to watch unfold? Moving offices, restructuring, new owners, new human resource policies, etc?

Are your coworkers the best….or the worst? Do you all get along or are office politics out of control? Is your boss amazing? Incompetent? The real life Michael Scott? We are looking for every kind of story, whether you have the dream job or work in a disaster zone! Tell us about the cast of characters in your workplace, and why you would all make great Television!

Casting for the first season is taking place in Southern California ONLY. So if your office has 10 employees or more and all are legal residents of the U.S., The Casting Firm wants to hear from you.  If you’re interested send your name, contact details, the name of your company, along with photos of you and your coworkers to casting.docuseries@gmail.com. Make sure you include a contact number so someone from their staff can contact you. For more information visit The Casting Firm’s Office Intervention link here.

Good luck!

Disclaimer: Really Bad Boss is not affiliated with The Casting Firm.

But then I remember a couple of things. One, she works for the government. Until I did my stint with agencies in both the federal and state government, I thought people gave the government and government employees an unfair shake. Now after logging over five years inside government bureaucracies I understand what all the hostility is about. But I’ve also got the unique advantage of understanding it from both sides.

You know that miserable DMV worker who barks out instructions at you from behind her cage? Or the customer service rep who keeps giving you the run-around when you call for answers? Well in some cases they’ve been beaten up so much by management that they no longer care. Granted, some of them are just mean-spirited, incompetent people (like the one years ago who smiled when she told me I had exhausted my unemployment benefits.)  But many were like me, well educated, smart, laid off from corporate America, looking for work and, despite embarrassingly low salaries, determined to make a go of it.

When I took my first job with the government I signed on for, and was prepared for lower pay, longer hours and a higher level of bureaucracy than in the private sector. I was not prepared for nor had I signed on for micromanagement, pantyhose inspections, or military type treatment. My “superiors,” who had less business experience and less formal education than I had, were petty and arrogant. They had attained their status simply by outlasting everyone else. Tenure is king in the public sector. And if your goal is power and a fat pension upon retirement, then your best bet is to make life hell for anyone you perceive as a threat. If you’re also insecure in your abilities (because you’re keenly aware you have none) constantly reminding people that you’re the boss serves as a boon to the ego.

So when I hear that my former bad boss has been promoted it leaves a bitter taste in my mouth, and it’s not because I want what she has. It’s because I know that she got where she is by stepping on the backs and dreams of people probably much more competent and qualified than she’ll ever be.

And so, another bad boss empire expands…

Got any bad boss success stores that chap your hide? Share your stories in the comment section.

Jenny works, correction worked, for a jerk. Apparently she’s had enough, and decided to quit with the assistance of  messages on a dry erase board.  Here’s how Jenny quit her jerk of a bad boss. P.S. She emailed it to the entire office! (Images via thechive.com)

1.

2.

3.

See the rest of Jenny’s dry erase board resignation here…

What the blogosphere’s saying about bosses this week…

• Forbes covers bully bosses, providing tips for both employees and HR personnel. Check out part two here.

• Are some of the worst bosses in the hospitality industry? Ironic, isn’t it?

• When a bad boss becomes a creature feature.

• Get past the automated voices and you’ll find the dialogue in this clever cartoon about a bad boss and the waste of time annual review process, pretty witty and spot on. I think I’ve actually had this conversation.

She gives me assignments that require the use of certain programs that are installed on only a few computers in the company, and then does not allow me to work on those computers. She also gives me busy work, and work that involves materials that she knows I am allergic to. She advised me that my job title is dead and told me to start looking for a job elsewhere.

A bright spot in all of this the fact that I won a company people’s choice award for an outstanding job. Normally anonymous nominations are not allowed, but the officials in the contest knew enough about the tensions that they saw our service area would have had no award if they did not allow employees to speak anonymously. The award was signed by the manager two steps above my boss, but I was not present to receive it, because I thought I was not welcome at the banquet.

I am writing this to try to make another bright spot. I know I have untapped creativity and talent that is going to waste 40 hours a week. I have tried taking classes in the evening but I am too distracted by anger from work to concentrate. I am looking for collaborators to learn more about computer programming, web development, making PowerPoint presentations, or comedy writing. We could start out our sessions commiserating about our bad boss and then be able to focus on the project we have chosen. If we make money, we can split it, but my main goal is to improve skills and restore sanity.

If you’re interested in sharing your thoughts, ideas and skills with Andee, please email him at andeeharris44(@)hotmail.com (remove parenthesis.)*

Please note, my inclusion of Andee’s contact information is not an endorsement. Andee is independent of Reallybadboss.com and operates as such. Any affiliation or association developed via this post is independent of Reallybadboss.com.

My boss required me to go to compliance training. The compliance training stated that I was required to report violations or else I would be committing a violation myself. The violations I reported were committed by my boss (and she escaped punishment by lying), and now I am on her hit list.

She is currently in the process of isolating me. She is telling everyone that I report every mistake that they make and some refuse to speak to me because of it. (Of course, mistakes and violations of the law are two entirely different things, but this is lost on my boss.) She has had another employee ask me “as a favor” to do something that is violation of privacy policies and I have refused. She assigned me to a task (through the employee who normally performs this function) that would have required I stretch the truth to satisfy the customer (who was a different employee in my department). I did not stretch the truth, then my boss redid the assignment with the truth stretched. This employee was very upset with me and had special favor with my boss for a few days, but, now that she is over her anger, she is no longer my boss’s favorite.

My boss has promoted the office gossip because she knows of sneaky ways to irritate people, including tampering with my phone and computer. I have two people I can confide in at work, one my boss knows about and one she is trying to flush out. The one my boss knows about has told me that the last person who confided in her about my boss got fired, and she does not want that to happen to me, so she is backing away.

Not only is this guy faced with an a** of a boss but one who’s bullying him into breaking the law. Any thoughts on the best way to handle this situation? Share your thoughts in the comment section.

Wednesday: Part Two – Finding a bright spot

For years I wasted entire Sundays absolutely dreading Monday mornings.   The uneasy feeling would start to creep in on Saturday night, and by Sunday evening, I was a basket case.  For many of us Monday spells the end of the weekend, the start of the work week and a return to a real tool of a boss.  For two years I endured a verbally abusive boss (I fondly refer to him now as the Reprobate) who ran around cursing at the top of his lungs and leering at the women in the office.

The company made beauty aids, including a “bikini bump” soother. Once he asked one of the young women in the office to be the “bikini bump” product model. Of course she knew this meant wearing a bikini to the photo shoot. She didn’t realize it entailed wearing one to the office and having The Reprobate and his spawn ogle her while she “gave them an idea” of what the shoot would look like. She did it. We all were there and none of us protested. We didn’t talk to HR – because there was none. And we certainly didn’t contact the EEOC. We put up with it and we stayed. I stayed because it was my first job out of college and, fresh out of school, I wasn’t aware of my rights. The other women in the office probably felt the same way – afraid of losing their jobs.

So I put up with it.  And while putting up with it, I learned some really valuable lessons. I learned I was stronger and smarter than I had given myself credit for. The Reprobate sent me from city to city to check on products without a plan or clearly defined purpose. He would bark out a command that I go visit a drug chain in some remote city out west, and I’d be gone on literally, a wing and a prayer. In those pre-GPS days, I would get off the plane, rent a car, get a map and sometimes 10 hours later end up back at my hotel room, tired and angry, but done. I told myself every day, “this is the worst job I’ll ever have”, and I meant it. I’ve never again put up with that type of abuse and I’ve turned every bad boss situation I’ve had since then into a learning experience.

Wednesday: Another real-life, really bad boss tale

What the blogosphere’s saying about bosses this week…

• Are the new TSA pat-downs more like rub-downs?

• Need a boss personality type manual? Check this out at The Sydney Morning Herald.

• Does your boss display Jekyll and Hyde tendencies? Yes? Read on.

• My favorite bad boss post title ever in the history of bad boss post titles: Bitchslapping Narcissus: 9 keys to surviving a bad boss. And the post is pretty great too.

• And check out our own real life, really bad boss tale from a reader here.

When last we met, I was poised to re-enter the workforce. Armed with positive vibes, great credentials and a clearance COACH bag full of enthusiasm, I began sending off inspired cover letters and resumes tweaked to within an inch of their lives. As of this writing, I’ve been contacted by a former employer who I’m certain was the inspiration for the expression, “A lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine.”

I’ve been negotiating with him for over a week now to agree on my rates and the amount of hours his project would require each month. Talking to this man is like talking to a bag of flour – useful if you’re making biscuits but not so much if you want intelligent conversation. We’ll call him Bob.

Bob was supposed to call me on Monday night to finalize my project hours for the week. This was after having a circular conversation with him on Monday which consisted of him asking “So, you can’t come in today?” and me responding “No, Bob, I can’t come in today.” I proceeded to explain in detail that I was working on several other projects and that Bob couldn’t expect me to drop everything at a moment’s notice. At the end of my five minute explanation, Bob says, “So, you can’t come in today?” *Sigh* We ended the conversation with Bob promising to call me Monday when he’d pinned down my schedule and agreed to my rates.

The next time I heard from Bob was at 7:08 this morning (Wednesday). He called and left a message on my cell phone marked “urgent.” Bob was “calling to confirm that you’ll be in the office at 9:00am this morning.”  *Sighs*

God help me.

I’ve decided to communicate with Bob in writing. That way there’s less chance of misunderstandings, right? Right? *Long sigh*

My really bad boss story spans 9 months of hell (at a Big 10 university by the way), when I experienced nothing but excruciating pain while sitting at my desk all day. Mind you, a few months prior I had sat at another desk area (as a temporary employee) and was fine, but the ergonomics of this new area had been adjusted to the former shorter person who had worked there.  At any rate, due to the pain that I could no longer tolerate after having endured it for months and trying to adjust things to help, I contacted our internal HR person to bring it up to her. I got no response from her, so after 2 weeks I inquired with her again as to what I could do.  She brought this up to our “really bad boss” and he proceeded from there to be the c*ck blocker from hell.

I spoke with him in person and his point blank answer was for me to have my doctor write a note requesting that an ergonomic chair be ordered for me. He made a point to point out that management and support people have different height chairs.  (This is where I wanted to point out that he is a douche, and I am a tall woman with a size 40 I cup breasts to hold up and that a chair that hits me mid-back below the shoulder blades does not cut it!)  I proceeded to see my primary physician, she wrote the note, I supplied the note to him and nothing happened from there.  About a month went by and I asked if anything was going to proceed due to my conversation w/ him and my note from my doctor. His idea was to completely ignore me from that point forward until I finally contacted the ergonomics group where I work to help me.

Once they got involved, he had to comply with their recommendations. Slowly I got help in raising up my desk items and a few minor adjustments, but in the meantime I was in searing physical pain that forced me into physical therapy for which I had to pay- not my employer (whose fault this sh*tty workstation was).  I did physical therapy for 2 months waiting for more answers and assistance.  Finally at the 7 month mark the ergonomic dept. gave a formal recommendation for a chair, for which my douchebag boss already had the note (that he asked for!) 7 months prior.  An entire month went by with no conversation from him, no response that he had ordered the chair- nothing.

I finally went to external HR (outside of our dept) to force them to get him to give me an answer.  He gave me an answer. His answer was first: that I should never go to outside HR to ask for help since he is my HR person for our dept. (what the f*ck???!) and that he only received the request from ergonomics 1 month ago and that had not allowed him time to respond. (what??!!!).  This was his douchey, sh*tty answer to my now 7-8 months of pain, physical therapy and fighting to get a damn correct chair.  I had finally had it. I wanted to go postal on this mofo, but instead I brought in my own high-backed chair and informed him that this was a temporary situation.  It still took him 2 weeks later to move his ass and even order the item (in the meantime he blamed everyone but himself for the 8 f-ing months of delays).  I finally got this chair 9 months after my doctor wrote the note that he requested himself! This %^$** should have been fired for the way he handled this as an “HR” person.  He is a financial person who wears an HR hat that he should not have because he is absolutely horrible in dealing with human beings.

Since then, he has been a complete a-hole to deal with, c*ck blocking everything in all directions because he demands complete and total control over everyone and everything under him. I only took this stupid, underling, low-paying job because I had no choice- it was a job and the economy is horrible.  Prior to this I had been in management for 10 years and sat in a high-backed chair- no physical problems.  I feel sorry for him that he feels so small as to need to control so heavily. He’s a really bad boss that needs to retire.

Sincerely,

Chairwhipped

Do you have a really bad boss story? Send it to denised@reallybadboss.com and we’ll feature it in a future post.

How to Manage an Office Bully: Are You a Bully?

Denise Dawson, who runs the ReallyBadBoss.com blog, describes her first boss as “the worst bully,” a cursing and screaming type who preferred to rule by fear.  “We felt like prisoners more than employees,” she says. “Morale was awful. Attrition was atrocious.”
She worked at a small, family-owned company that made bikini wax products. The lowest point came when he asked another employee to model a bikini to give him a better idea of how they could improve their products. “And she wore it,” Dawson says. “None of us said anything. We were all scared of losing our jobs.”

What Dawson witnessed may be extreme, but the fear she described is not unique. Do your employees complain of random sabotage, harassment, humiliation or isolation? There’s a good chance they are being bullied.

OfficeArrow, an online community for office managers and small business owners, created a quiz to see if you are a bully. For those who fear they are in a bully’s bull’s eye, the Workplace Bullying Institute has a checklist of early bullying signs that includes an unreasonably demanding boss, “surprise” meetings designed to humiliate, retaliatory behavior, unfounded accusations of harassment, and extreme work-related stress that interferes with your health and personal life.

Read the complete article, including a definition of workplace bullying, online at Inc.com.

Dear Denise,

I report to the Bus. Dev. Manager – a lady with 23 years of experience in her field of expertise and good at her job when she focuses on it.
Why is she the boss from Hell ?
a. She gets angry when she has to do actual WORK because it interrupts her extra-curricular activities – CHURCH & CHARITY. Screaming, shouting are the highlights of the day.
b. All her staff are bullied into supporting her Church Charity Organisation – coerced into buying books, donating money  etc. If we dont, we are ungrateful, stingy, godless creatures.
c. She lies to HR about her activities in the field – urgent meeting with client actually means church meeting to disscuss fund-raising) etc…. you catch my drift.  All employees are required to lie blatanly saying that she has a meeting with important clients.
d. Her entertainment claim for company’s clients is utilised for taking pastor and his family, church board directors for big lunches and dinners, wooing potential contributors for her charitable organisation.
e. Her petrol card provided by the company is used for ferrying various church members to and fro. Collection of donation in kind from existing company’s clients all in the name of charity.
f.  Personal remarks she has made to me – I’m not blessed by God that’s why I dont own a car, cant carry a designer brand handbag, have no husband. Your personal life must be an open book to her.
g. Personal remarks she has made to me – I’m a negative personality that’s why I don’t go to Church. She (Boss) is very blessed and that’s why God has given her a Mercedes.
h. Personal remarks to me and others – If God has blessed you, you have no money problems, you will not be sick etc. Only Christian people are honest and do good work.
i.  Personal remarks to me and others – She is a happy person because God has blessed her for her passion in doing charity work. Because we dont support her charity, we will not be blessed hence no bonus and no increment.
j.  I was never told that handling the paperwork for her Christian Charity org. was in my job scope during the interview. Her pet charity home was launched in 2009. During my recent appraisal, I asked her for an incentive as this was extra work.  Her response was that I was ungrateful, did I not realize this was GOD’s work?, she also threatened me saying that she would fire me, make sure that I would be disciplined by HR for insubordination.
k. Her tirade went on for an hour whereby she stated that she has tried to counsel and instill CHRISTIAN VALUES in her staff but I’m ungrateful, extremely cold person and resistant to change and need to be taught a lesson.
l.  Her statement “anyone who goes against me will end up badly.” By the way HR Manager is deadly afraid of her because my boss is on very good terms with the CEO of the company. All complaints, protests by me and other employees to HR have been squashed. Instead, HR liberally issues disciplinary action letters upon request by my boss for our department.

Suffice to say this is the last straw for me – after 3 years of enduring her personal remarks and abuse; I am actively seeking a position elsewhere. In my department when my boss joined in 2007, there were 7 of us. Now only my boss and I remain in this department. I tolerated and swallowed this abuse for years. Nobody deserves this sort of treament.

A Victim

Sounds like ‘A Victim’ works for a real lunatic. I hope her job search goes well and she’s able to get away from this woman as soon as possible. I wonder if the lunatics pastor knows she’s stealing time and resources from her company to care for the church? Something tells me he/she’s got to have some idea about what’s going on. And if so, they’re just as bad as she is.

Send your bad boss story to denised@reallybadboss.com.

So how can you be sure about what you’re getting into? The answer is, you’re never really completely certain about the company you’re joining or the boss you’re about to report to. But if you pay close attention during the interview process, you might pick up on a few signs that may indicate you’re headed for rough waters.

In part I of You Might be Getting a Bad Boss, I list the first three of ten indicators that might suggest trouble ahead…

1. During the interview, the interviewer contradicts him/herself frequently – When you first inquire about why the position is open, you’re told the company is expanding. Later on the interviewer reveals that you’re replacing someone who’s no longer with the company. Whether the person was fired, or left by choice, the interviewers contradictory response could indicate either a predilection to, let’s just say, being fluid with the truth, or general confusion on their part. Either way, it’s not a good thing. Other contradictions I’ve experienced during interviews is waffling about turnover rates, the length of time the average employee stays with the company, and surprisingly enough, something as simple as office hours.

2. The interviewer begins a sentence with “Family is important, but…” – I once had a promising first stage interview with a Human Resources manager who ended the interview by asking me how important family was to me. I thought it was an odd question since most people I know would reply that their family is very important.  And that’s exactly how I responded. She responded that although it was important to her too, her job was more important. That response set alarms off. Although she hadn’t come straight out and asked me, I believe what she really wanted to know was whether I had children, and if they’d interfere with me doing my job. I didn’t and so they wouldn’t have, but that kind of inflexibility and probing on her part was telling.

Later on I found out that a friend who had accepted the position, routinely worked 70 hour workweeks, resulting in a nervous breakdown six months into the job. Would you believe that same HR Manager didn’t want to give her sick leave for the days of work she missed, and later terminated her for “lack of professionalism”? Be wary of illegal interview questions in disguise. Click here for examples of illegal interview questions.

3. The job has been open for a long time, or been filled and emptied in a short period of time – This happens in the hospitality industry pretty frequently, but if you’re dealing with a more stable industry, this kind of volatility might be a sign of bad management on a corporate level or a really bad boss on a more local level.  At one of the previous companies I worked for, the customer service manager position had been open for over a year. In a period of less than six months, they hired two candidates. One left after being unable to tolerate the level of unprofessionalism showed by her manager and the other was terminated for repeatedly falling asleep on the job. Either way, bad management was at the root of the problem. The problem in this scenario was management, and no amount of experience, talent or skill could make up for what they lacked.

Wednesday: Part II – Rude, late and unprepared

For two years I endured a verbally abusive boss who ran around cursing at the top of his lungs and leering at the women in the office. I stayed because it was my first job out of college. I’d left home and didn’t want to return humiliated and defeated. And, fresh out of school, I wasn’t aware of my rights and thought this was just the way business was done. So I put up with it.

While putting up with it, I learned some really valuable lessons. I learned I was stronger and smarter than I had given myself credit for. The Reprobate sent me from city to city to check on products without a plan or clearly defined purpose. He would bark out a command that I go visit a drug chain in some remote city out west, and I’d be gone on literally, a wing and a prayer. In those pre-GPS days, I would get off the plane, rent a car, get a map and sometimes 10 hours later end up back at my hotel room, tired and angry, but done. I told myself every day, “this is the worst job I’ll ever have”, and I meant it. I’ve never again put up with that type of abuse and I’ve turned every bad boss situation I’ve had since then into a learning experience.

A couple of tips to help you get through this week:

1. Take it one day at a time. If on Monday morning, you’re worrying about what might happen on Wednesday, by Wednesday you’ll be a wreck. Begin mentally prepping yourself from Sunday night. Take it easy on Sunday, rest and enjoy the day as much as possible.  Its sometimes easier said than done, but practice enjoying your days away from the office. Don’t spend them dreading Monday.
2. Remember that everything, and I mean everything, that happens is preparing you for the next phase in your life and career. Learning to deal with a micro-manager will teach you patience, an incompetent one will teach you to step up your game to the next level, and a reprobate will show you who you don’t want to be when you move up the management pipeline.  Soak up as much knowledge and information as you can.  Try to see every trial and obstacle as an opportunity to advance your skill set.  Last but not least, repeat after me, “what doesn’t kill me will make me stronger. “

This article was originally posted in March, 2009.

Knowing that Bob slept with the enemy reduced his IQ, in my mind, far below the already tragically low number at which it was hovering. I guess we should have seen the writing on the wall much sooner than we had. Let’s see – there were the times we’d walk into her office to find him kneeling next to her chair looking intently at the “computer screen.” Or maybe we should have known when she sent him a bottle of his favorite cologne – to the office. But all doubts should have been erased when he got a promotion although he was the newest, least qualified and most IQ challenged member of the team.

Despite all the hints, none of us ever thought that the two of them (both married) would be stupid enough to carry on an affair. You watch this kind of stuff on prime time TV and of course, David Letterman probably set some kind of standard for doing stuff like this, but still, you just don’t see it coming.

The fact is, I can’t think of any scenario where sleeping with your boss is a good idea. Not one. I’ve always thought those relationships were creepy at best and potential career suicide at worst. And even if your boss isn’t one of the bad guys – or gals – it’s still a good idea to just say no.

What are your thoughts on sleeping with the enemy – is it ever a good idea? Share your thoughts in the comment section.

In the lawsuit, Lo, 20, claims that Thomas Guerriero, CEO and president of Guerriero Wealth Holdings Inc., turned her dream job into a “raunchy, intimidating, and sexualized” workplace. If his text messages are any indication, Lo is right…

“I wanna make u cumm like u never had is that a bad thing I know ul love it,”

Lo’s attorney is claiming that Guerriero is like a “rich kid spoiled rotten” who had no reservations about emailing pornography and obscene texts to “a 19-year-old who idolized him for his financial prowess.”

Even after Lo stopped responding to his text, she claims Guerriero continued to pursue her sexually, touching her legs and leaving a sexually explicit Post-It note on her desk. He even emailed her saying he’d been thinking of her while at the spa, and wanted to make another video, but wasn’t sure how much she’d liked the first one. I think he probably has a clear idea now.

For his part, while Guerriero admits to “some flirtation” between the two, he denies any sexual harassment. Read the whole story and more of Guerriero’s ridiculously inappropriate texts here at The Village Voice. (Image source: The Village Voice – Thomas Guerriero)

A One Woman Show

Who would have thought that a couple years after being laid off (again) from a job working for (yet another) bad boss, that I’d be wearing the hats of marketing manager, artistic director, sales woman, PR person and human resources? And that’s just on a Monday.  At times it can be overwhelming and I certainly put in more hours than I’ve ever put in in my life, but the not having to answer to an idiot part and the not having to beg someone for time off part, well that makes it all worth while – even those months when I just squeak by. And I have no one to thank but the string of bad bosses who made me so angry and frustrated that I vowed I’d never work for another one again.

Working hard for everyone else

The irony is that despite the layoff track record, I’ve been working really hard for other people my entire adult life. I was the kind of employee who showed up early, stayed late and worked hard and smart because I took pride in what I did – even when my efforts were ignored. In the case of the worst bosses, my efforts were often ignored, undermined, or simply dismissed. And year after year I watched amazed as men and women who couldn’t work their their way out of a paper bag ran million dollar divisions and corporations and I wondered what they had that I didn’t.

Some of them were simply handed their jobs by parents who’d worked hard and never quite transferred the same work ethic to their kids. Others just happened to be in the right place at the right time. And still others were coasting by on dumb luck. As I walked out of the office the day I was laid off, leaving behind the most ridiculous CEO I’d ever met and the most insane HR manager I’d had to misfortune of working with, I thought out loud – there’s got to be a better way than this.

I promise, it really does make you stronger

Fortunately while I’d been suffering at the hands of the latest motley crew, I’d been learning in the process. I took foreign language courses, software classes and brushed up on management training skills (ironic I know.) I took on projects I’d had no prior experience doing and tapped people more knowledgeable than I was to help me. The moral of today’s story is this – put up with that moron for a little while longer – maybe a lot while longer. But put up with him or her and learn everything there is to learn about your job, your career and your industry while you’re stuck where you are. If possible, learn something totally out of the box. Tell yourself you’re getting more out of this than they are, and milk your current opportunities for all they’re worth. If possible, do it at your company’s expense (taking courses, training etc., not stealing office supplies.)

If you were anything like me, at times you’ll go home feeling defeated. You’ll worry about things you have no control over and you’ll wonder “why am I going through this?!?” Go ahead and feel those feelings. If you’re dealing with a really bad boss, it would be inhuman not to. But, a bad boss can’t kill you – no really, legally he can’t. And so, even though what doesn’t kill you still hurts, it really does make you stronger in the long run. I’m living proof.