It was a short work week for most, but there was no shortage of bad behavior among really bad bosses:

• Can you hear me now?- Paul Liska was fired from his CFO position with Motorola back in February and is now suing them for wrongful termination. He says the firing was retaliation for being honest with Motorola’s board about the dire straits of its cell phone division. Motorola says that Liska had been on his way out for a while.  The truth probably lies somewhere in between, but experience has taught us that really bad bosses have a tendency to fire people who tell them the truth.
• Liar liar pants on fire - Pinky and the Brain, aka Rod Blagojevich and Roland Burris, are still denying any wrongdoing.  And while Blago continues to ride the publicity train, this week transcripts were released that show Roland Burris doing exactly what he’s denied doing for months – talking to Rob Blagojevich (Pinky’s brother) about the senate seat he so coveted.  Is anyone else tired of politicians treating lying as though it’s some kind of art form? We know we are.
• You might be a Really Bad Boss if… you bash your housekeeper over the head with an ashtray.  The ashtray basher in question is George Bardwil, CEO of Bardwil Home Linens. He said he thought she was stealing. Now she won’t have to steal because once her fractured skull heals, she’s going to sue him for every penny he has.

…you bash your housekeeper over the head with an ashtray, fracturing her skull.  Truth is, even if you hadn’t fractured her skull, the whole bashing her over the head thing would have qualified you.

Over the weekend, George Bardwil, 57, chief executive officer of  Bardwil Home Linens was picked up by police for allegedly fracturing his housekeepers skull. He told police he’d discovered his housekeeper sprawled on the floor and that he’d suspected her of stealing. We think he must have consulted with Naomi Campbell before wielding the offending ashtray, noting that an ashtray would cause a much more serious injury than simply throwing a cell phone.

Source:  Top News

Rod and Roland - aka Pinky and the Brain

Not these two again- Rod Blagojevich and Roland Burris (aka Pinky and the Brain) are at it again – denying the obvious and doing their best to convince us that we are all deaf, dumb, and blind.  

Unfortunately for them, unlike the very special group of people who will continue to support their elected candidate, even after he’s caught on video smoking crack, the rest of us can smell a hot mess a mile away, even if it’s sporting a massive pompadour.  Burris, despite transcripts released Tuesday that reveal the exact opposite, continues to deny attempting to buy the vacant Chicago senate seat from Blagojevich.  The transcripts reveal Burris telling Rob Blagojevich, Pinky’s brother, that he’d  ”personally do something” to help the governor’s campaign.  The transcripts also show Burris saying “I know I could give him a check… well we, we, I, I will personally do something, okay.”

Burris, says (in what we imagine is a very whiny, high pitched voice) that he realized after getting off the phone with Rob Blagojevich, that he couldn’t do it.  He said he couldn’t risk the appearance of impropriety.  It’s amazing that he didn’t realize that while on tape. Burris’ attorney is asking for a smoking gun, suggesting that the wiretaps don’t provide enough evidence to support the claims that Burris tried to buy the seat.  Apparently his attorney has forgotten (see deaf, dumb and blind reference above) that under oath, Burris denied ever having any conversations with any Blagojevich regarding the senate seat and money. Read the rest of this entry »

Another employee gets fired for telling management something they never want to hear…the truth.

 Back in February, Paul Liska was fired from his CFO position at Motorola.  A lawsuit filed by Liska claims he was fired the day after a board meeting in which he outlined the problems he saw with the company’s ill performing ‘Mobile Devices’ cell phone division.  In his presentation, Liska brought to light the fact that the division missed sales projections for the previous months. He also questioned the current year’s projections and criticized the lack of a forecast for the year 2010. He claims he was fired as a direct result of the statements he made at that meeting.  For their part, Motorola says Liska knew he was on his way out, and made the statements at the board meeting to lay the groundwork for a whistleblower case.

The truth probably lies somewhere in the middle.  But, it reinforces one of the biggest reasons people keep quiet in the face of even the worst management decisions: sometimes telling the truth will get you fired.  I’ve talked about this previously with regards to the auto industry execs’ decision to fly a private jet to Washington DC to beg for a bailout.  I’m convinced that at least one person in middle management, or lower, thought that the private jet thing was a disaster waiting to happen.   That individual may have been bold enough to speak up, but was immediately dismissed, most likely because what he/she was suggesting – that driving the company product might be a great way to promote the brand and the industry, and that flying a private jet might be seen as excessive – made too much sense.  Upon returning from the meeting with egg on their face, I imagined a conversation going something like this:

Really Bad Boss who doesn’t listen, speaking to low level employee who suggested executives drive – not fly – to DC :   “why did you book a private jet for the meeting?”

Low level employee, thinking, but not saying… ”is he crazy ?!?”, instead responding:  “but you said…and when I tried to tell you … but that’s not what you said before…” Read the rest of this entry »

Unauthorized trashcan searches, Burger King Management really having it their way, and the rapping RNC chair

• Clandestine trashcan searches and snackless hell - A look at some of the ridiculous and thinly disguised power-plays really bad bosses make in a pitiful attempt at relevancy
• Burger King has to pay up again, as yet another one of its managers takes their slogan, “have it your way” literally
• Don’t call it a comeback - The RNC chair was at it again this week, trying to remain relevant by appeasing lord Limbaugh and keepin’ it real at the same time 
• If Really Bad Boss ruled the world, Blagojevich would be deported, bonuses would only be awarded to CEOs who did a good job and cult enthusiasts would be imprisoned
• Edward Liddy resigned as CEO from the embattled AIG after only nine months.  Apparently it was a really hard job.  In fairness to Liddy, he came into a mess and agreed to accept an annual salary of $1 to try to fix it.  He didn’t help himself when less than a week after receiving government bailout money the company rewarded insurance agents who sold AIG policies with a $440,000 trip to a California resort.
• And, because it wouldn’t be Really Bad Boss week in review without a Blago mention – There’s a new Blago fighting for the spotlight.  It’s Rod Blagojevich’s wife, and she apparently loves the spotlight as much as he does.  Patti is set to appear on the reality TV blow show “I’m a Celebrity, get me out of here.”   NBC apparently doesn’t care that she’s neither a celebrity or particularly interesting and lacks the trademark Blago helmet head that hypnotizes people into paying attention.  Intent on assaulting our airwaves with another dose of reality show rubbish, they’re banking on the fact that she’s a Blagojevich and will instinctively pepper the show with the requisite amount of edgy profanity.  I hope they have their bleepers ready.

With my well documented penchant for really bad boss fantasies, it’s no surprise that I’ve daydreamed about a world managed by the creators of Reallybadboss.com.  In this brave new world, idiotic, immoral and just plain stupid bosses would be stripped of their authority and replaced by their wiser, more charming subordinates.  Our agenda would be simple – rid the world of really bad bosses, one monumental screw up at a time.  Our non-violent, but effective movement would strike fear in the hearts of incompetents worldwide, resulting in unprecedented activities by really bad bosses including; thinking, making sense and repeating the process at least twice a week. 

As rulers of this brave new world, our first official act would be to declare Fridays, International Really Bad Boss Shut Up and Sit Down Day, or IRBBSUSD.  During IRBBSUSD, with the threat of  having to watch graphic, unedited video of  their biggest foul-ups hanging over their heads, really bad bosses everywhere would be required by law to shut up and sit down.  Other official acts would include: 

1. The immediate and irrevocable deportation of Rod Blagojevich. What’s that? He was born here? Well, in a world run by Really Bad Boss, being an arrogant, unethical, lying tool of a politician is enough for permanent Nationality Revocation. Yes, revocation is a word, and even if it wasn’t, in my world, I could make it one (see IRBBSUSD above.)
2. Surgical removal of strings from Michael Steele’s back. He would then be forced to walk, talk and rap without Rush Limbaugh orchestrating his every move.
3. Bonuses would no longer be awarded to the CEOs of companies that don’t turn a profit. Section 12b, subsection 42 also states that if said company continues to operate with loses year after year, the CEO would…wait for it… lose his or her job. A novel idea, but years of firing subordinates who underperform have shown that getting rid of them…gets rid of them.
4. Encouraging employees to “drink the Kool-Aid,” will result in imprisonment. No, I will not let this go. Anyone who thinks a cult leader is an icon should be incarcerated.
5. CEO interviews will be conducted by the IT department.  They’re the only ones in the company who really know what’s going on, they know how to fix just about anything, and most importantly, they can make grown men cry.

Got something you’d like to add?  Add it in the comment section after the jump. Read the rest of this entry »

Thou shall not steele (Photo by Alex Wong/Getty Images for Meet the Press)

Republican National Committee Chairman Michael Steele threatens comeback – I figured RNC Chair Michael Steele would appreciate the reference to LL Cool J’s 1991 hip-hop hit “Mama Said Knock You Out.” 

Hip Hop rallies aside, Steele, before a crowd of supporters at the Republican National Committee’s 2009 State Chairman’s meeting, declared “The honeymoon is over…the era of apologizing for Republican mistakes of the past is now officially over.”  The party reserved the right to apologize to Rush Limbaugh if ever they have an original thought.  Steele ended his speech with a five minute human beat box solo. No, not really, but I’m sure he was tempted.

Steele urged republicans to take the gloves off and start going directly after Obama and his “disastrous” policies.  Regardless of your political persuasion, it’s hard to take anything Steele says seriously. The first few months in his role as RNC chair he waffled back and forth so often, it was hard to determine which was his true voice and which was the voice of his puppeteer Rush Limbaugh.   There was a large asterisk hovering over Steele’s head as he delivered his speech.  A check of the fine print revealed the following: 

*All official statements made by Michael Steele must be approved by Rush Limbaugh before being official statements of the Republican National Party.  Even if you think you heard him say it, have it on tape and saw the interview on television, if Rush disagrees with it, then Steele didn’t really say it.